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saturday night.

May. 19th, 2008 | 09:33 am
mood: not stressed.
music: tragedy.

i hate phoenix and the heat makes me feel sick (i can't seem to get hydrated!), but it was definitely worth it. i was welcomed in the best way ever, and seeing cody makes me cry every stupid time. i held hands with one of my best friends during 7g's set, and spent a lot of time catching up with another good friend that i only see once every few years.
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i have friends in town from california and i'm about to go wake them all up so we can get breakfast at martans.
summer is awesome and i'm so grateful for every single one of you.

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today is may 13th.

May. 13th, 2008 | 06:11 pm
mood: coldcold, but good.

i woke up to 2 inches of snow.

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(no subject)

May. 11th, 2008 | 07:08 pm

i'm in phoenix for the weekend, but i've had the stupid flu the whole time. my mom has made so much amazing food and i can only have a few bites before i'm ready to pass out or throw it up. i've been waiting to come home and turn my brain off; but of course, when i find time for that, my body shuts down.
today my mom took me to leelee's market. i stocked up on rice candy, baby bananas, and soybean pudding. i saw a man take a fish out of a tank and beat its head in with a hammer.
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(no subject)

May. 8th, 2008 | 09:22 am

to those of you that are really fucking broke:
when you're stressing because you're not sure if you can make rent in a few weeks, how do you deal?

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procrastinating.

May. 3rd, 2008 | 06:51 pm
mood: bummed.

even though i woke up at 8 this morning to start studying for finals, and i've been to 2 different coffee shops, i still feel like i've accomplished nothing. i even felt guilty for taking a 20 minute break to check out (and spend money i don't have on) old records on phoenix street. this whole spending thing has GOT to stop. i spent $5 on burritos last night after drinking too much free wine and still feel guilty. guilty guilty guilty. and i still don't like wine.
the dog that had puppies in my bathroom is back with us until her milk ducts dry up so she can be spayed. i woke up to her stinky face on my pillow begging me to take her out today. i remembered that it's been exactly 2 months since i lost my best friend. god, what a fucking mess that day was. i still feel like my limbs are missing.
i bought a mini bottle of new shampoo so i have a reason to shower.
nothing new is going on in my life. i have finals next week and can't wait to be 1 semester closer to graduating, though the thought of having to figure out what i'm doing with the rest of my life is completely fucking horrifying. i start my second job in 1 week, and turned down 1 of the research projects i wanted to work on. i figured that i turned down everything else that would make me happy (and hinder me from paying rent), why not turn this down too?
one of the few people that i consider a close friend in this town is obsessed with a girl and doesn't call or drop by anymore. i wish my guy friends wouldn't do this to me. it really sucks to know that my friendship isn't appreciated.
i feel guilty for wasting 15 minutes of my life typing this. back to phagocytosis and lophophorates.

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(no subject)

Apr. 24th, 2008 | 03:11 pm

this is how lame my microbiology professor is:
i spent almost 4 hours writing a 2 page paper because i REALLY needed the 100 points. i emailed him my paper, along with every single one of my citations attached (just to make it easier), AND i turned in a hard copy to him. i get my paper back today and see my 98% crossed off, and a 48% written next to it. the piece of shit took off 50 points because i didn't print a hard copy out of every single citation (WHICH YOU DON'T EVEN DO IN THE SCIENCE WORLD, MISTER). i told him i wasn't trying to be disrespectful, but that i was becoming very annoyed with his way of grading. we didn't get an outline for the paper, we didn't get directions, and the syllabus gives us hardly any information. i noticed 15 or 20 other students behind me, all wondering why their grades went from an A to an F. only a few more weeks, and assuming i pass, i'll never have to hear about immunology or macrophages EVERRRRR!
anyways, the strawberries at new frontiers are really fresh and the only high light of this stupid week. tomorrow i'm working at the arboretum, and i'm SO excited to not have to work behind a microscope all day. i start my new job at flagstaff's FIRST vegan restaurant in a few weeks, and i'm pretty excited. i swore off the food industry after 4 years at dillons, but who could turn down free raw chocolate smoothies and organic vegan quiche?! so stoked.
oh...and if you haven't seen "king of spiders", i highly recommend it.

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(no subject)

Apr. 9th, 2008 | 11:18 pm
mood: highbloated.

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(no subject)

Apr. 5th, 2008 | 09:01 pm

why does it
feel like i've been run over in traffic
scratching in the dust of someone's leaving
punches in my gut
oh look i'm bleeding
not for you for me this time this time

just for the record there is no record
that's the problem
there is no this-is-what-you-said
cause that's already gone

all we have are our love and our guts baby
all we have are our love and our guts baby
and they're all over the road

you don't know the difference between anger and pissed off
one is doing and one is feeling
and i'm feeling

i need to be healed
just saying it does it
just smashing it crushes it
just loving it douses it

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stupid.

Mar. 30th, 2008 | 09:08 pm

i'm not really sure what my advisor gets paid to do. from what i've gathered in my 37 years of schooling, an advisor makes his/her living (with my loan money that i will pay back until i'm dead) helping students graduate. i'm also pretty sure this means returning phone calls and emails. the classes i need to take to graduate are not being offered, and i'm assuming my advisor is the person who remedies this situation. i know my advisor is a real person because i've seen him before; he has a lisp and wears that overpriced patagonia shit made from recycled soda cans. it has finally come to the point where i am so terrified to walk into his office. he's going to think "oh! i know this girl. i've been blowing her off for 2 years now!" and i'll probably lose my temper. now, i know i should have gone to his office when i noticed he wasn't going to ever get back to me...but thinking this way isn't going to help my current situation. i'm not even really sure anything will help my current situation. i've tried contacting other professors, but apparently they also get paid to ignore students. or maybe this is a big scam to keep me in school, paying these people to wear fucking tevas and eat steak dinners.
i have lost all motivation.

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question.

Mar. 29th, 2008 | 11:40 pm

does anyone know how to make all of my past posts private or friends only without having to do it one by one?

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